171 Drink Puns & Jokes: You Should Read

Ever mixed a bit of humor with your favorite drink? That’s exactly what drink puns do! They’re the perfect blend, turning every sip into a giggle. It’s like having your cocktail and laughing at it too.

Whether you’re a coffee lover or a wine aficionado, adding a pun into the mix can make your day. So, let’s raise our glasses to the art of punning, where every beverage gets a chance to be the life of the party.

Classic Cocktail Puns to Stir Your Funny Bone

1. Martini: “I asked for a joke, and the bartender gave me a martini. It was a dry one.”
2. Margarita: “I have a friend named Margarita. We call her Rita, but she’s much saltier.”
3. Mojito: “Mojitos are just leafy drinks. They mint well, though.”
4. Old Fashioned: “I told an old-fashioned joke, but it was too bitter for some.”
5. Manhattan: “I took a sip of Manhattan, now I feel so cosmopolitan.”
6. Piña Colada: “Piña coladas are like tropical vacations – you can never have just one.”
7. Bloody Mary: “Bloody Mary had a little lamb, with celery and a dash of Tabasco.
8. Cosmopolitan: “I tried to make a cosmopolitan joke, but it was too sophisticated for my taste.”
9. Tequila Sunrise: “Watching a tequila sunrise makes me feel spirited away.”
10. Mai Tai: “Mai Tai’s motto: Why be sour when you can be sweet and strong?
11. Gin and Tonic: “I mixed gin with my problems and got tonic solutions.”
12. Mint Julep: “Mint Julep asked me for a date. It was very refreshing.”
13. Rum Punch: “I drank a rum punch and woke up feeling like I’d been hit by fruity fists.”
14. Screwdriver: “A screwdriver is really just a tool for getting through the weekend.”
15. Whiskey Sour: “I told a whiskey its joke was bad. It just became sour.”
16. White Russian: “I had a White Russian last night. We’re comrades now.”
17. Long Island Iced Tea: “I got lost on the way to Long Island, ended up in a tea cup.
18. Bellini: “I made a Bellini smile. Now, it’s a Peachy-Grin-i.”
19. Negroni: “I asked a Negroni for its secret. It said, ‘Bitterness, but make it fashion.’
20. Aperol Spritz: “An Aperol Spritz is like a sunset – but drinkable.
21. Espresso Martini: “An espresso martini told me to wake up and smell the coffee.”
22. French 75: “Drinking a French 75 is like a love affair: bubbly, sweet, and slightly intoxicating.
23. Dark ‘n’ Stormy: “A Dark ‘n’ Stormy night is best spent with a Dark ‘n’ Stormy in hand.
24. Daiquiri: “I shared a daiquiri with my fears and now we’re just chilling.”

Wine Puns That Will Have You Laughing Until You’re Red in the Face

1. Let’s get this party started on the right vine!
2. I’m feeling grape today, thanks for asking!
3. Wine not have another glass?
4. This wine is absolutely un-grape-able!
5. It’s wine o’clock somewhere!
6. I’m on cloud wine right now.
7. Read between the wines.
8. You had me at merlot.
9. Chardonnay or should I go?
10. Sip happens, especially with wine.
11. Stop and smell the rosé.
12. Keep calm and cabernet on!
13. You’re the riesling my heart smiles.
14. That’s a pour decision, but I support it.
15. Wine a little, laugh a lot.
16. My day just took a turn for the Bordeaux.
17. Pinot more, worry less.
18. I make pour decisions but with great taste in wine.
19. Age gets better with wine.
20. Will you be my wine-ness?
21. Sweet dreams are made of cheese and wine.
22. Merlot down and tell me about your day.
23. Life is too short for bad wine.

Beer Puns That Are Ale-mazingly Hilarious

1. Don’t worry, be hoppy!
2. I’m just here for the beer.
3. Beer my guest!
4. Life is brew-tiful.
5. Hop-til you drop.
6. This might be ale we need.
7. Let’s get this pilsner party started!
8. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
9. Ale’s well that ends well.
10. Just brew it!
11. Keep calm and carry on…to the next beer.
12. Wish you were beer.
13. Feeling hop-timistic about tonight!
14. Time to get basted.
15. It’s beer o’clock!
16. Ale hello there!
17. Let’s raise a glass to good friends and good beer.
18. Here’s to yeast we can do!
19. Stout-hearted men always welcome.
20. Brew can do it!
21. Let’s hop to it and have some fun!
22. IP-Aye Captain!
23. The road to beer there is never long.
24. Let the evening be-gin with beer!
25. Stay calm and hop on.

Coffee Puns That Will Perk Up Your Day

1. Espresso yourself; life’s too short for bad coffee!
2. Decaf coffee is just un-bean-lievable.
3. I like my jokes like I like my coffee – dark and strong.
4. Stay grounded and keep brewing.
5. A day without coffee is like… just kidding, I have no idea.
6. Instant coffee is a total mug’s game.
7. Don’t worry, be frappe!
8. Bean thinking of you a latte.
9. Let’s stir up some trouble and espresso our feelings.
10. I told my wife she was the cream in my coffee. Now, everything’s latte than never.
11. When life gives you lemons, trade them for coffee.
12. Our friendship is brew-tiful.
13. It’s a brew-tiful day to save lives.
14. Keep calm and drink strong coffee.
15. Love is in the air, and it smells like coffee.
16. Where there’s a will, there’s a latte.
17. Life happens, coffee helps.
18. Too much Monday, not enough coffee.
19. I can’t espresso how much you bean to me.
20. Wake up and smell the coffee.
21. A yawn is a silent scream for coffee.
22. The best time for coffee? Now. The second-best time? Later.
23. You mocha me very happy.
24. Thanks a latte for being my friend.
25. Today’s good mood is sponsored by coffee.

Tea Puns That Are a Brew-tea-ful Addition to Any Conversation

1. Let’s spill the tea on how brew-tea-ful you really are!
2. Tea is a hug in a mug, so let’s embrace the warmth together.
3. You’re just my cup of tea – especially when things get steep!
4. Life is like a cup of tea, it’s all in how you make it.
5. Don’t worry, be hoppy… Oh wait, that’s beer. Let’s stick to the calming teas!
6. Are we tea-mates? Because I feel a special blend with you.
7. You must be a teapot, because when the heat’s on, you’re steaming!
8. Keep calm and put the kettle on, let’s solve it over a cup of tea.
9. Can’t we all just get oolong?
10. Steep dreams are made of teas, who am I to disa-brew?
11. Our friendship is like a good tea, it gets better with age.
12. This conversation is a little chai, let’s spice it up!
13. Is it tea you’re looking for? Because I can see it in your smile.
14. Matcha ado about nothing, let’s just relax with this tea.
15. You’re the chai of my life, always spicing things up!
16. Let’s not let this moment steep too long, or it might get bitter.
17. Feeling a bit Earl Grey? Let’s brighten up with a cuppa!
18. I think we blend well together, like tea and honey.
19. Our bond is as strong as a double-brewed cup of breakfast tea!
20. Tea is the key to sereni-tea, let’s unlock it together.
21. You’re sweeter than sugar and spice, and everything nice, like my favorite tea.
22. Let’s chai and catch up – it’s been too long since our last tea talk!

Soda Puns That Will Pop a Smile on Your Face

1. Are you a soda? Because you soda-lightful to be around!
2. I’m soda-pressed without you.
3. Let’s have a soda; it’s soda-mn good!
4. This conversation is flat; it needs more soda puns to bubble up.
5. I soda think we were meant to be.
6. You’re just soda-rn cute!
7. Feeling unpop-ular? Add some soda to your life!
8. Don’t trust atoms; they make up everything… except soda, that’s a can-do attitude!
9. I can’t stop drinking soda; it’s my fizz-vice.
10. You’re the soda my rum’s been missing.
11. Let’s give them something to taco ’bout: soda with lime!
12. Keep calm and carry on… with a soda in hand.
13. I’d like a soda on the rocks. Hold the rocks, hold the soda, just give me the puns.
14. I’m not addicted to soda, I’m just in a committed relationship.
15. Did you hear about the soda that broke up with the juice? It said, “It’s not you, it’s fizz.”
16. My love for soda isn’t flat, it’s carbonated.
17. Don’t be salty like potato chips, be sweet like soda.
18. Why did the soda go to therapy? Because it had too many bottled-up emotions.
19. I’d tell you a soda pun, but it might fall flat.
20. A day without soda is like… just kidding, I have no idea.
21. Why was the soda always busy? Because it was soda-manding.
22. Soda puns? Can do!
23. Soda-lighted to meet you, let’s pop open a conversation!
24. When life gives you lemons, add them to your soda!

Water Puns That Are Sure to Make a Splash

1. Are you a dam? Because you’re impound-ing my heart.
2. Water you waiting for? Dive into the fun!
3. Ice met you and I’m already melting.
4. Water we doing tonight?
5. I’m a well of emotions, overflowing with feelings for you.
6. Don’t harbor your feelings, let the river run!
7. Stay hydrated or you might make pour decisions.
8. I’d lake to get to know you better.
9. Our love is deep, like the ocean.
10. Just going with the flow until I waterfall for you.
11. Let’s sea where this goes.
12. Hydro you think you are, looking so fine?
13. Water way to have a good time!
14. You must be made of water because you’re absolutely crushing it.
15. Don’t be salty, sweeten up the conversation!
16. You otter know how much I care about you.
17. Let minnow if you want to hang out.
18. We’re two of a kind, like fish in the sea.
19. Stream-ing with excitement every time I see you.
20. I can’t water down my feelings for you.
21. Our friendship is like a river, it just keeps flowing.
22. Keep calm and stay buoyant.
23. That joke was eau so hilarious!
24. Water-logged with thoughts of you.

Cheers to drink puns, the perfect mix of humor and hydration! Whether it’s a giggle over gin or a chuckle with chai, these puns are pour-fect for lightening the mood. So, let’s raise our glasses to laughter – it’s always on the house!